Updated: Jun 5
Let me start off by saying Sis, that ending was your beginning. If you have heard the words “I want a divorce” then let me tell you, take it as that chapter is closing but your next chapter you are about to start can possibly be your greatest chapter written.
It gets hard, because you have to get used to being alone again but remember you were born alone. There is still life after divorce and hope for happiness as a single woman finding her again.
The way the beginning feels, you think it is the end and you will never get through that hurt, anger, pain, and you feel everything is bad, not working out or just too much but it won’t last forever.
Divorce is difficult, heartbreaking and so many other things. All you’re thinking about is how your life is about to change, your parenting if you have kids, and even yourself. It can bring you to hit rock bottom then you ever have before.
That roller coaster ride is ready to start because after ending a marriage it can feel a lot like that. Once that ride ends Sis i want you to climb out and get ready to cross that bridge to rebuild a life you are excited about. No matter if rebuilding your life after taking you on another roller coaster ride just know that ride will benefit and open up your best season.
Here are 7 tips to help you through that “rebuilding life after divorce” stage and get you back into life.
The breakup of a marriage is like a death, so it’s natural to mourn the life and lifestyle you’ve lost. So take time to grieve. Don't let it be a long time. It’s not meant to be long but only for a short while.
2. Commit to being a survivor, not a victim of what happened
You are a Victor and not a Victim and you affirm that every day if you have to. Don’t let what happened to you hold power over you.
3. Stop taking control of what you are powerless over
Stop trying to change what can’t be changed. If it is out of your control then let it be. This can be tougher than it sounds but you can do it. You are on your way to moving on to healthier ways and it requires you to be fearless.
4. Connect with friends and family that will support you
Divorce is already hard and contains so much negativity, embarrassment, shame, sadness, disappointment and oh don’t let me forget depression that it can be easy to isolate yourself from the world. Let that be all the more reason to stay connected to those who love and accept you for who you are.
5. Start Journaling
Writing about your emotional struggles may reduce some of the stress and pain. If anything, journaling can help with your healing process. It gives you clarity and perspective in a more clearer way.
6. Seek professional support
Its hard going through a heartbreak, hurt, pain and things alone. You can’t figure or even begin to think about where to begin rebuilding your life back. Reaching out to a Coach, Therapist, Spiritual Advisor or any other professional support you need can benefit you on your journey.
7. Reinvent yourself
Take this time to reconnect with you. Your heart misses that love you once gave it before you married. List things about yourself that once gave you joy before you became a wife? What do you value most about yourself? What are your strengths and weaknesses? Unique attributes? These are just a few of the questions you can ask yourself and they can start you on the next chapter in your journey.
In any relationship no matter how good or bad they are we give up a part of ourselves. When you’ve out of a dark place, celebrate! Celebrate the small win because rebuilding life after divorce is a process that is ongoing but guess what so are you.
There is never an end to the opportunity to build life.
You’ve got this. You are worth it. You matter. So get busy being better.
I’m Coach B, a Certified Life & Relationship Coach. If you need additional support healing from past heartbreak, building self-love and creating a life you enjoy, preparing you to embrace & attract love again in a healthy way., you can subscribe to my newsletter for free goodies, tips and more or schedule a 30 minute private consultation with me.